Madrid, Spain

Why I chose to go to Spain:Excitement, opportunity, and exploration are the three words that suggest why I chose to live and study in Madrid, Spain.

Excitement. I feel excitement about spending long evenings in the parks of Madrid, sipping sangria with friends. I feel excitement about spending long nights dancing in the local pubs and tapas bars. I also feel excitement about gazing upon beautiful vistas, pieces of artwork, and historical churches.

Opportunities. I will embrace the opportunities available to me in a large city: the museums, galleries, and sports events. In a large city like Madrid, opportunities to learn and experience new things that await around every street corner.

Exploration. Most importantly, I anticipate with enthusiasm the prospect of exploration that Madrid allows me. I am eager to explore the culture of its people and of other surrounding Spanish cities. I foresee myself taking long walks through the city, learning the ways of the people through observation. When I picture myself in Madrid, I see myself as a child, wide-eyed and eager to learn about my new world.

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What I identified as the greatest challenges facing me as I began my study abroad program: I think my biggest challenge in Spain will be the frustration of not being able to convey my personality because of the language barrier. I rely on humor and wit to carry me though difficult and awkward situations, and I know that this familiar technique will not work, given that my Spanish is limited to greetings and the names of foods and kitchen utensils. I am afraid of being perceived as a timid foreign girl. I want to be able to shine through as myself, to have my host family and Spanish friends truly understand who I am. I am afraid of the loneliness that will result from not being understood.

I try to reassure myself that words are just one small part of communicating with others. People will observe my visual cues, such as facial expressions, and gestures, and tonal cues, such as laughter, and voice inflection when making judgments about my personality. I have to remember that the words will come eventually, and I will just have to be patient with myself. I must understand the cultural differences that may complicate my relationships with Spaniards, and must not take any small clashes too personally. I will feel successful in Spain if, by the end of my 6 months, small bits of my personality shine through to my host family.

How life abroad might be easier than life in the U.S.: When my plane touches down in Madrid, I will function at a more juvenile level — one that I haven't experienced for years. My low level of Spanish is my ticket to this youthful wonderland; it will bring me into a blissful state where mistakes are welcomed, and even expected of me. I will have to give up my weighty efforts to present myself as intelligent, and float freely instead in the land of mistakes and misunderstandings. This is a land where my laughter and acceptance of imperfection come easily, and phrases like, “don’t worry about it,” and “shake if off” rule the day. I long to escape from the trappings of self-criticism, and enter into a world where the only expectation I have of myself is that I will make mistakes.

How I'd like to see my study abroad experience: The impact of my study abroad experience in Spain has forever shaped my outlook on life and my perspective on mankind. I now have a much better understanding of what it means to be a North American. I am much more aware of the ways my personality traits, values, and beliefs have been influenced and fed by my Northern American culture. Before going to Spain, I thought that I had a clear understanding of myself. What I didn’t realize was that I was seeing myself in relation to others who were part of my own culture, people who came from my same part of a color spectrum, as it were. The contrast was like trying to compare purple to lavender and violet. Throughout the seven months I spent in Western Europe, I was finally exposed to many other colors and tones, such as rich reds and blues. This gave me a much better understanding and appreciation of what it is to be "purple."

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Read excerpts from my letters home.